Navigating Depression When Your Child Leaves the Nest

It can be hard to believe that time went by so quickly. When you have children, it feels as if you blink and suddenly they are all grown up.

Maybe your only child is leaving home for the first time or they are your last. In either case, you are in a new chapter of your life. This new chapter of not having kids living at home is referred to as empty nest syndrome.

Empty nest syndrome is not a disorder that you can be clinically diagnosed with. However, that does not mean that it isn't a very real condition that can impact your life in profound ways. Depression, anxiety, and grief are all common symptoms experienced by parents during this time period. At the same time, you are likely feeling relief, joy, and hope not only for them but for yourself as well.

If you are struggling to deal with depression as an empty nester, here's how to navigate that.

Navigation Depression as an Empty Nester

Step 1: Accept That It Is Normal, and Your Feelings Are Valid

Feeling depressed about your children leaving home is entirely normal. Yes, this is a happy and exciting time for all involved. New beginnings are fantastic, but they are also downright scary. If you are feeling depressed, your feelings are completely valid.

You might feel pressure to downplay your feelings or mask them entirely. However, neither of those things help you in the long run. In fact, it can worsen and prolong depression symptoms and may eventually turn into clinical depression.

Step 2: Acknowledge That Your Child May Be Feeling Depressed Too

We said it before, and we'll say it again — change is scary. While your child may outwardly show elation about this new beginning, they are likely experiencing heavier feelings like sadness and uncertainty.

While you aren't happy they are experiencing this, it can give you, your partner, and your child hope. It's a transition period for all involved. Having each other to share in this experience can make everyone feel more at ease.

Step 3: Think of This as a New Beginning for You

Since they were born, your life revolved around your children. And while you were happy to become a parent, you can't deny that your life and interests got put on hold.

Depression has a nasty way of making you have no desire to participate in your favorite activities or hobbies. It might be challenging, but you can try and combat feelings of depression by spending some time each day with a hobby you haven't been able to focus on. You don't need to feel pressure to spend an hour or more on something. Doing things in small increments can be beneficial.

Step 4: Know That You're Still a Parent

This is something that a lot of parents struggle with when their children leave home. It's common for many parents to see this time as an end to their parenting. That isn't the case at all. Yes, your children are grown and are becoming independent. That doesn't mean that they still won't need your help or guidance.

Your role as a parent may be changing, but you are still very much one.

Step 5: Talk to Someone

As humans, we have a tendency to keep our feelings bottled up. We don't want to feel like our problems are a burden for someone else to hear about. Additionally, we don't want to feel shamed or misunderstood about what we are going through.

As a parent whose child has transitioned out of the home, you might feel uncomfortable expressing how uneasy you feel about this new chapter. We understand how challenging it is and would love to be your support system.

Don't hesitate to contact us to learn more about life transition counseling or depression treatment.